God's love
I meant to post this last night, but I was just so tired and my eyes were hurting. But the thoughts have, thankfully, stayed.
So, Wednesday wasn't the best work day. I won't go into details, so let's just say it was really, really rough. So rough that I ate chocolate ice cream (my go-to stress-reliever food) straight from the carton. Yeah. I felt down for the pretty much the rest of day until church. I spent the 2 hours that I had at home after work in my room watching figure skating videos on YouTube (I have always loved figure skating). So, on the way to church, I turned on my Jesus music (the local Christian radio station) and on came the song "Fierce" by Jesus Culture. When I first started listening to Christian music back in 2014, I didn't really like the modern worship songs because they were so repetitive. Now, worship music is really most of the Christian music that I listen to. And for good reason! I always feel like I'm praying during those songs because it's like they get me; and I just don't feel that way when I listen to, say Britt Nicole or TobyMac.
But anyway, the chorus always gets me. "Like a tidal wave / crashing over me / rushing in to meet me here / Your love is fierce. / Like a hurricane / that I can't escape / tearing through the atmosphere / Your love is fierce."
Yesterday at work, I made some mistakes. There are days that I make mistakes that are like, "Oh okay. You're still a newbie. Every newbie does that." Some are more like, "Oops. How did that happen?" Yesterday was, "Yeah. I knew better. It won't happen again." But I still felt like crap, that my manager didn't like me, that I would forever feel like I'm being watched at work from now on because of that one mistake.
Being a perfectionist, I take everything to my head. I get stuck in my head and I can't ever get out of it no matter how much I think of something else. Then as "Fierce" came on the radio, that feeling of letting people down at work left. I suddenly believed, as if out of nowhere, that God really did love me with an everlasting, unconditional, fierce love. I may let myself, others, and God down, but He absolutely never gives up on me, never lets me down, and never stops loving me. And I still cannot wrap my head around it.
God's love is just so amazing, I will never be able to understand it. And I can only experience so much of it here on earth. It will only be in heaven that I will be able to experience the entirety of His love. Whenever I pray, the first thing I always thank God for is His love. Because without His love, I would not be here; I would not have His marvelous grace, mercy, and life. I wouldn't have the everlasting life in His Son Jesus if He did not love me.
I would not be me without His love.
So, Wednesday wasn't the best work day. I won't go into details, so let's just say it was really, really rough. So rough that I ate chocolate ice cream (my go-to stress-reliever food) straight from the carton. Yeah. I felt down for the pretty much the rest of day until church. I spent the 2 hours that I had at home after work in my room watching figure skating videos on YouTube (I have always loved figure skating). So, on the way to church, I turned on my Jesus music (the local Christian radio station) and on came the song "Fierce" by Jesus Culture. When I first started listening to Christian music back in 2014, I didn't really like the modern worship songs because they were so repetitive. Now, worship music is really most of the Christian music that I listen to. And for good reason! I always feel like I'm praying during those songs because it's like they get me; and I just don't feel that way when I listen to, say Britt Nicole or TobyMac.
But anyway, the chorus always gets me. "Like a tidal wave / crashing over me / rushing in to meet me here / Your love is fierce. / Like a hurricane / that I can't escape / tearing through the atmosphere / Your love is fierce."
Yesterday at work, I made some mistakes. There are days that I make mistakes that are like, "Oh okay. You're still a newbie. Every newbie does that." Some are more like, "Oops. How did that happen?" Yesterday was, "Yeah. I knew better. It won't happen again." But I still felt like crap, that my manager didn't like me, that I would forever feel like I'm being watched at work from now on because of that one mistake.
Being a perfectionist, I take everything to my head. I get stuck in my head and I can't ever get out of it no matter how much I think of something else. Then as "Fierce" came on the radio, that feeling of letting people down at work left. I suddenly believed, as if out of nowhere, that God really did love me with an everlasting, unconditional, fierce love. I may let myself, others, and God down, but He absolutely never gives up on me, never lets me down, and never stops loving me. And I still cannot wrap my head around it.
God's love is just so amazing, I will never be able to understand it. And I can only experience so much of it here on earth. It will only be in heaven that I will be able to experience the entirety of His love. Whenever I pray, the first thing I always thank God for is His love. Because without His love, I would not be here; I would not have His marvelous grace, mercy, and life. I wouldn't have the everlasting life in His Son Jesus if He did not love me.
I would not be me without His love.
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